Handling Hatake
by Silimaira
Summary: Because sometimes we all get a little lost in the Road of Life. (Companion drabble-type fic to Kakashi's Kid. Self-insert, OC)
1. Worst talk ever (Ch1)

_~Hey, guys! Thanks to some suggestions, I have started this side-fic for Kakashi's Kid. It should fill in some scenes, include some new points of view, explain some things that haven't come up in the main story, and most importantly, attempt to provide something to read between updates._

 _If you haven't read Kakashi's Kid, feel free to go check it out! This doesn't really spoil anything, so perhaps you will consider it a preview. :) Either way, I hope you read my main fic. I've been told it gets pretty fun about eleven chapters in or so._

 _A little explanation of the formatting: If a chapter title has parentheses and an abbreviated chapter number next to it [for instance: 2. Lunch break (Ch17)] , then the content actually happened offscreen in the main story during the indicated chapter. If there's no chapter abbreviation, the content is purely hypothetical. The labels before the shorts will repeat the same information. I'll also put spoiler warnings before corresponding shorts and let you know which chapters of the main fic you should be current on._

 _If you have read the first chapter of KK already, I regret to inform you that there are no spoilers today. No freebies here, folks. I've given enough of those already. Heh, heh._

* * *

 **Time: Prologue**

* * *

 ** _Hokage's Office, Konoha. Two years after Ky_ _ū_ _bi._**

* * *

"Hokage-sama." Kakashi's voice was miserable as his gaze dropped to the floor. Had those scuff marks always been there? He hadn't noticed them before. Strange.

The Hokage's awful silence continued, and all Kakashi could dwell on was how _stupid_ and _reckless_ and _utterly mindless and irresponsible and simply completely void of forethought_ —

"I must thank you for bringing this matter to me," the Hokage said at last. "I admit I am surprised that such a situation would come from you of all people, but I am much more surprised by her decisions."

Kakashi shifted. "She," he offered uncomfortably, "said that there were two."

"Decisions?"

He flushed. "No, ah, twins. Children. Offspring." Were it not for the gravity of this conversation, he would almost suspect the older man was teasing him. "She listed that as her main reason."

The old man's face brightened. "Twins, eh? They're the right age to be my grandchildren. Are you hoping for girls or boys? One of both, perhaps?"

"I'm not _hoping_ , Hokage-sama! My actions have ruined both of us! I've ruined both of our reputations and lives. What happens when my enemies realize that they have something to strike at? I've endangered the village. I've created a liability."

Hiruzen held up a hand, wrinkles deepening under his hat. "Do not think of children as liabilities, Kakashi," he said severely. "You must accept what has happened, no matter how much easier things would be if she did not care for their future. Can you deny that Konoha will be safer for your children, Kakashi?"

"No," Kakashi admitted reluctantly.

"Very well. And do you attest that, so far as can be proven, you have fathered children with the girl who wrote you that letter?"

 _Never again_ , he promised himself. _I will never betray Konoha's safety again_. "Yes."

"Will you deny the mother of your own children her right to surrender them to you?"

He shook his head.

"Good," declared the Hokage. "Let's get started with their safety, then. I assume you will be able to handle bringing them to the village?"

Kakashi was struck with a sudden, horrible flashback of his old genin team's occasional babysitting missions. He had never handled the kids himself, but perhaps his own . . . his own children would be tolerable? Yes, he decided, they would, because they would be his. They would take after him. "Yes."

The Hokage snorted, but continued regardless. "I can afford a few months of parental leave, but—"

"No. I won't be taken off the mission roster." He _needed_ to be useful. He needed a way to cope and continue on. "With all due respect, Hokage-sama, I am one of your top ninja. I'll be useless if I spend all day changing diapers. The village needs me. Infants don't."

"If you insist," Hiruzen replied, shaking his head. "Are there any genin teams you would prefer?"

This was an easy decision. "Absolutely not. If you can spare me, you can spare other ANBU."

The Hokage, however, pressed on. "You won't consider a genin team? What about Saimaru's? He was Minato's teammate and has a solid team. You know he's competent, especially with his particular skill set. He has a good head on his shoulders."

As all of these points were valid (there was a reason Saimaru had lasted his post in the front lines for so long), Kakashi could hardly argue against this suggestion. "I'll consider his team if they're ready to be promoted. Are they ready?"

"They graduated this year, as you ought to remember from refusing to be their teacher. Saimaru is married, Kakashi. Most ANBU are not."

Kakashi's eyes narrowed. "I didn't ask for this."

"And yet," provided Hiruzen, "the entire village is going to see its young prodigy become a parent." There was a very strange silence as the Hiruzen stared at Kakashi, who was eyeing the floor in a new light. The older man cleared his throat. "What are you thinking?"

"Well, it would be less risky if—"

" _Absolutely not_. They are your children, and you will deal with them, not conceal them. Hiding them would actually raise more suspicions. Besides, staying home to look after newborns will not make you look bad. The village will see you as responsible."

"But I'm not—"

"Yes, I know. I'll keep you in rotation. However, I think you'll agree that your children's ANBU guard should be disguised as you, if only to give your children consistency. Do you have any specific guards in mind?"

"Not Root." Except Tenzō . . . but even he had been given a silencing seal.

The Hokage nodded in agreement. "Of course. Perhaps I shall ask my old friend Deer if he would be interested. His own son will be ready to join ANBU soon, so I think he would enjoy it. Weevil would be good, too, once he and his pupil return from their long-term assignment. How about your own friends?"

What friends? But come to think of it, certain distasteful images did spring to mind. "I don't want chakra to be used in front of them." He didn't want them to be influenced by anything less than perfection.

The Hokage cast him another knowing glance, which was really nothing but disconcerting. "Very well. Why don't you return home and get started on your preparations? From what you've reported, you don't have very long. You wouldn't want to disappoint their mother."

The letter had attested that it was far too late to avoid that.

It was honestly a shame they couldn't both be disappointed together.

* * *

 _~Hope you guys enjoyed it!_

 ** _If you haven't yet, please go and read the main story, Kakashi's Kid. Otherwise, I can promise you won't enjoy the following chapters in this side-fic very much. I mean, you might. But the main story has things like character interaction and build-up, you know? _**

_I've never really waxed eloquent about my characters or the plot, but I've always loved writing Saimaru. He's got a really dry, doleful sense of humor, and he's really quite an intelligent man. Unfortunately, I couldn't justify writing his background into KK, since Kana doesn't actually know much about him (so far). Beyond that, he's just one minor character. I hope that makes you wonder if any of the other minor characters have fleshed-out lives on my end of things, because most of them do. It's why I write about people, not stereotypical characters. :)_

 _Another small note about Saimaru: he was on Minato's team and under Jiraiya's tutelage. It's hard not to pick some things up! It's also nice to be considered trustworthy by an eventual Hokage. Makes you cannon fodder for babysitting._

 _I'm absurdly pleased with myself about the summary. I think it pokes fun at everyone very well (especially me). My thanks to Like Stars in the Sky for the main concept of it. _

_Is there anything you want to read about? I won't be able to cater to everything (sorry—I write slowly enough already), but questions are free. Hypothetical situations are fun. Bwahahahaha. We'll see what the next one will be about, eh?_

 _Anyway, if you have questions about anything, now's your chance!_


	2. Lunch break (Ch17)

_~A short one today. As a reminder, there's a poll in my profile to help me gauge what you guys want to read. Of course, reviews work, too!_

 _This one was actually a deleted scene (it got to happen off-screen because, well, it did), and it fits vaguely in the Itachi/Kana category. Itana? Kanachi? Watachi? Yuck, some of those sound like sneezes. Someone had better convince me that's a bad thing, because I'm really finding them amusing. *Wakachi!* Bless you._

* * *

 **Time: Chapter 17**

* * *

 **Directly outside Hokage's Office, Konoha. Seven years after Kyūbi.**

* * *

 _Twenty-four, twenty-five . . . come on, Itachi, how long does it takes to walk out of the Hokage's office? Oh, okay. Hello._

I trotted to his side. "Where do you think you're going?"

"Home," he said.

"Your mother is visiting one of her friends. Your father's at work. You're not bleeding." I grinned. "It's settled—we're immersing ourselves in a grueling genjutsu battle, a battle so fierce that your brother will see it from the Academy."

Itachi raised an eyebrow. "Oh, really."

I grinned more widely.

"And why are you not there with him?"

"Because I took the graduation exam yesterday, of course. I passed with flying colors. Like your summons on a sunny day!"

The stoic Uchiha looked at me seriously, weighing the likelihood . . . and snorted. "But not like your thrown weapons fly, no doubt."

Ouch.

Still ouch.

I huffed. "Fine, if you're going to be like that, I'll just head back to eat my lunch. Bye." I turned.

"I apologize if—"

"No, no, no, I only wanted to say hello, since you always come to spy on your brother after you report to the Hokage." He raised an eyebrow; I ignored it. "Anyway, some of the other kids have been looking for me. See ya!"

"Other kids" meaning Naruto, but, well, he kind of counted as two. Maybe even three. Eh.

I bounded off.

(Okay, it was possible that I was a bit self-conscious about the aim joke. At this point, I wasn't even ready to think about taking the exam, not unless failing the practical part was allowed. So no more jokes about that.)

* * *

 _~Thanks to everyone who was kind enough to review! Also, some chronological replies to the anonymous: pao (That sounds like a hypothetical idea for sure. We'll see!), Guest (*guilt* Sorry! Sorry. Sob. At least I don't have any thoughts about abandoning it, so that's one plus), and Guest (Aw, great! I'll keep going, then)._

 _Out of curiosity, just how much romance does everyone actually want to see? So far I wouldn't count any of this as romantic. Just deep, which is, I bet, going to leave more of an impact than straight romance would. Personally, I'll read romance, but I read it for the deeper emotions, not for the love part. But I'm curious if you guys want to read that sort of thing. Your opinion! It wants to be voiced. :)_

 _As for my opinion, my main character is five right now. This story is rated K+. Since this story goes into all the trouble of writing itself (within reason), I'll let it continue doing that. Simple for me, right? Yeahhh, right._


	3. Helpful reflections (Ch18)

_~Heeey, guys, nice of me to show my face again, right? Don't get too excited. My talent of being overwhelmed has grown that much stronger, and I'm about to go submerge again. Sorry-not-sorry!_

* * *

 _ **Time: Chapter 18**_

* * *

 **Uchiha Compound, Konoha. Seven years after Kyūbi.**

* * *

"Itachi," Mikoto said quietly as he walked in the front door. "You do realize that however mature that girl is, she is still very young, right?"

"Of course, Mother." But that was no reply, and he knew it. His mother deserved much more than that . . . and to be honest, he owed a discussion to Wakana. Not _to_ the girl―he didn't care how ridiculously mature she was―but he needed to have a conversation with a trustworthy adult, and Shisui didn't count. His mother would know what to do. She would help.

"Your father and brother won't be back for several more hours. Would you like to help with the laundry?"

He had another mission tonight, and he really needed to research the history of the village he'd be heading to. "Of course." He had time. Spending it with his mother was an ever-increasing rarity.

"Do your thoughts toward her concern you?"

"No. She is a person I value. I enjoy her spirit and the perception she shares freely. My thoughts do not trouble me."

"There is nothing wrong with having friends, Itachi," she replied. "Friendships tie people together. You have precious few as it is. I am sorry your father and I never gave you a sister, but this is a wonderful opportunity for you to see another child grow."

Somehow, he felt like Wakana watched him grow, and that while he knew her very well, she knew everything about him. He'd had to stop himself from voicing his worries about the clan several times now, and even then, she'd seemed to catch on. Perceptive barely began to describe Wakana. One day, she would become a household name for her talent at using that perceptiveness to her favor, because no matter what happened, he had no doubt that she would somehow come out on top.

Wakana carried an air of victory―as if she had been born with the knowledge that the future would turn out in her favor. It was an air that Itachi had only seen twice before. Minato had had it, and a wizened lady who owned a tea house had possessed it, too. It wasn't optimism. It was a sense of assurance.

It meant that Itachi could never see his young friend as a child.

"Let her be a child, Itachi. She hasn't seen what we have seen."

His mother didn't understand. Perhaps he should have this conversation with the Hokage, instead. He knew the village leader understood.

He owed Wakana an explanation.

But of what, he couldn't explain.

He nodded to his mother and finished folding the clothes for her, content in the thought that he wouldn't have to explain anything to Kakashi's daughter _. Kakashi,_ on the other hand. . . _._

* * *

 _~Okay,_ now _sorry-not-sorry. Hahaha._

 _But let's keep in mind that people's perceptions of each other aren't always accurate, and often jaded or skewed by something. So I think comparing their opinions is really funny._

 _Hehe, Itachi-rant. Which has basically shown nothing._

 _See you guys later!_


	4. Tsukuyomi proposal

_**Time: Hypothetical future**_

* * *

 _ **Outside Konoha. Thirteen years after Kyūbi.**_

* * *

"This is a joke, right?" Kakashi tried to rub a finger in one ear, but he was firmly caught in Itachi's Tsukuyomi and chained down. Blasted Uchiha prodigies. Blasted Uchiha sense of humor.

"This is not a joke, Kakashi-san." The red-eyed traitor met Kakashi's gaze with an expression that was far too serious.

"Really? Because I thought I just heard a traitor that murdered his own mother ask to marry my daughter. In what universe is that not a joke?"

"You know me," the traitor replied.

"No," said Kakashi, feeling his sanity slip out of the genjutsu without him, "I _knew_ you, and up until now I was willing to give you the benefit of a doubt. Now I know you really are insane. Congratulations."

The teenage Uchiha shrugged. "I know it seems strange, but—"

Kakashi snorted. "My _twelve_ -year-old daughter, Itachi. This really must be your ultimate genjutsu technique if you think you can convince me to go with _that_."

"I was raised this way," the Uchiha explained. "Your consent is something I value immensely."

 _Kill me now_ , Kakashi thought, choosing to ignore the inconsistencies with the Uchiha's whole mass-murderer reputation. Lethal Itachi was one thing. Hopeful son-in-law? Nope. Nope, nope. Nope. "And you think torturing me will get you that?"

Itachi pulled a sword out of the air casually. "Well, I figured I may as well start early."

* * *

 _~It came to me a few minutes ago. Now let's never speak of it again. I think this might qualify as crack._

 _Okay, I guess I'll reply to_ _those darling reviews now. Anon replies: Gal (Oh, I will! Just not this bit of it) and Guest (Sure, if you insist)—thanks!_

 _Sorry it short I not care. It was just a concept, anyway. (;_


	5. Eye for an eye

_~Before we begin this one, a quick word. I love this idea. But using this one for KK is_ not possible _, because I refuse to make things this convenient. No way. So, this one is out. And I honestly love this one. I'm very glad I forced myself to go the serious route instead of crack, because it works so well._

 _Alas, this one can never be._

* * *

Warning: spoilers if you haven't read chapter 20 yet. Don't let yourself miss out!

* * *

 **Time: hypothetical (several weeks after the Ch** **ū** **nin Exam in Kiri)**

* * *

 **Naka Forest, Uchiha Compound, Konoha. Eight years after Kyūbi.**

* * *

I shivered, but not because of the cold. Hundreds of leaves danced in this forest, all courting a final rest with the predecessors under my wary feet. The forest whispered around me as I paused to touch one of the rough, beautiful trees. They were solid. Not fickle like the water tugging at my hearing. Stable. Kind. I breathed in the promises of the trees and heard their branches tremble in the lazy breeze.

Since the trees were not the reason I was here, I moved on. The water pulled me upstream until the ripples were nearly drowned out by the greed of a waterfall. The rushing, tumbling water was gorgeous. I wasn't here because of the waterfall, either, but this was where I stayed. I sat at the very edge of the cliff and watched shards of liquid diamond pour into the river below. The view was mesmerizing.

What I _saw_ was not.

This was the same river Shisui had died in as he gave his eye to Itachi.

This was the last view Shisui would have.

This was the place where my _friend_ would say goodbye to the world. The Shisui who had trolled me, and taken me exploring, and kept stalking my henges in Konoha—he would die.

And so even though I was only here because I'd found a note in my school lunch, even though evening began to approach—I sat here and watched the marbled reflections in the water far below. For a friend I couldn't keep forever, I would wait. I would wait for Itachi when the time came, and this was part of it.

For my friends. . . .

"You waited," Shisui said from behind me.

I roused myself from my pointless thoughts and couldn't fight back the sudden smile. "I've always waited for you, Sparkles-san. You're my special secret teacher." I stood up, ready for some jibe at my cuteness or something more embarrassing.

Instead, my throat choked on a gasp.

Pain darted through his face. "I'm sorry, Kana," he said. "I'd hoped to spare you, but there's no time."

How . . . was it sunset already? His eye. The rest of him. The agony I saw. Had _seen_. Saw in front of me now.

"Itachi's out of the village," Shisui explained, feeding my horror. "When he comes back, I need you to tell him that it was too late. He can explain the Mangekyō to you, but my Sharingan has a genjutsu called Kotoamatsukami that makes people do whatever I want without being aware of it. I tried to use it, but Danzō took my right eye. He doesn't trust me."

I felt like the world had turned to stone. "Shisui—Shisui-san. Are you saying you tried to—that because the village—sake of—" A helpless wail began to build in my throat, blocking all attempts at speech. I didn't recognize the sensation.

He crouched down and put a hand on my shoulder. "It seems I've underestimated you after all, my young friend. Yes, I decided to stop the coup to avoid invasion. I love this village and my family, but my duty is to more than a clan. Itachi told me you see the village the same as we do. Is this true?"

An image flashed through my head of having to sacrifice Kato and I couldn't find the strength to nod. But I knew. Like my father, I knew that while love went far, love went beyond family or one person. If . . . if only Kakashi were in the village right now. But he wasn't. Itachi wasn't. I nodded shakily and returned Shisui's red-eyed gaze.

Shisui's eye flickered. "You're so young, Kana. I'm so sorry. But I need you to promise me."

The wail threatened to escape, and I was sorely tempted to let it.

"Promise me that you will stay far from the clan after this. Itachi will seek you out. But you will not associate with the clan in any way. Do you promise?"

I was a one-trick pony, but I nodded. Goodbye to Shisui. Goodbye to Kiyomi and Sasuke. Goodbye to Mikoto and the clan that held my chakra in their hands.

"Good," he said. "Now, will you accept my eye?"

Oh, Daddy was going to kill me when he got home. But what else could Shisui do?

I nodded.

When he took his hand from my shoulder, I froze in expectant horror. But instead of reaching for his eye, he put his hands together. _Now_ the wail escaped my mouth. The sorrow I heard, the hopelessness. I reached for Shisui with my eyes because the rest of me was incapable.

Shisui looked back like a man burning a bridge with his enemies and his wife on the other side. "I'll numb you before I start. You won't feel anything."

What had felt like stone now turned into a black hole that threatened to tear me apart. Reality ripped and shredded. Shisui wasn't a dense man. He tried to blunt the fear.

"I trust you, Kana. We could have been close friends one day. I respect the dream you hold deep within you and I give you this gift to help fulfill it. My eye cannot fall into the wrong hands, and without Itachi here, you are the only one I trust with it. I know who you are, Kana. I know who you will become. You and I are alike.

"Without Itachi to protect the eye, I have no way to keep it from Danzō. You do. You are Hatake-san's daughter and unless I've lost my touch, the daughter of the Mizukage. Danzō cannot touch something that is a physical part of you. The Hokage or Hatake-san might have given him my eye, but he's powerless to take it from you while they protect you.

"My eye might make you a target, but you will be able to use it as well as any Uchiha. Your chakra will stabilize. You will have immense power because of it. It's a gift, Kana. Will you accept it?"

I wanted to touch my right eye one last time, but my body was still largely frozen. I nodded.

"Thank you," he said gravely. He flashed through a series of handseals and laid his hands on my shoulders. I lost every scrap of feeling in my entire body (except for the frantic disbelief). "Close your eyes," he murmured gently.

I couldn't feel. But my hearing still maintained its tenacious hold on my life, and I heard his fingers brush softly against my skin in a sad caress. His other hand braced the back of my head.

And then . . . inside my own head. The. There. I heard a glass vial pop open and phlunk shut.

He . . . his own eye, next, and then he pushed it into. . . .

Painfully wet hands slid together in a healing jutsu and hovered over my face. Cloth came from somewhere and rubbed carefully. "You can open them now," he said.

I. Did. Not. Want. To.

But I opened them, and apart from slightly fuzzier vision in my right eye, I noticed nothing. Just Shisui's sad, comforting face. "Is it activated?" he asked.

I shook my head before I remembered that he was blind. I tried to take a breath.

"I don't need to see you to see that," he said wryly, lips twitching up. "But I taught you how the Uchiha use the Sharingan. Activate it."

The instant that clan genjutsu came to mind, my right eye sprang to life. I staggered. Shisui caught me before I got a firsthand view of the river. The world had turned to colors and it was _complete_ now as my vision melded with my hearing. Shisui's heartbeat was a color, a sound, and a truth. A law of the universe. Behind him, the world was a kaleidoscope of certainty.

"Good," he said. He smiled at me painfully. "You'll remember this forever now. It's a burden and a blessing. But let me give a message to my cousin." He aged another decade in that pause. But he smiled into his Sharingan and spoke.

"Itachi, you are my closest friend. By this point, you'll know that my gift to you is the Mangekyō. Please don't refuse it, it's my dying wish. I can see your face, you know. Worry doesn't look good on you. You must always remain calm, my friend. That's what Uchiha Itachi is. I know you can do this. So don't worry. It'll be fine.

"From now on, your path will be filled with pain and suffering. I apologize, Itachi, that I can't walk through it with you. Still, even though your path will be long and dark, I have faith that you won't falter and will move forward as a Leaf ninja. I believe in you. That's why I can ask you to carry on my will . . . and the Mangekyō.

"Thank you . . . for everything. I guess this is the end of my path, but this will pave a new road for you, with new power." He faltered and turned away. "Well, Itachi . . . the time has come. Make a new way for yourself with your own hands. Y—"

I launched myself into his chest and buried my face in his collar, sobbing. He hugged me back fiercely. "Take care of Kana," he continued, voice forcing itself to stay steady. "She has my eye now and it's your responsibility to teach her to use it. Danzō must never find out that she has my eye. Keep . . . let her make her own path. She shares my will, too.

"I . . . believe in you. I know you can do it. My best friend."

Shisui removed me slowly. "Listen, Kana. The numbing jutsu will wear out soon. Once it does, you need to mimic Itachi's chakra and appearance and go home. Promise me that, too."

By some miracle, I could do more than nod. "But—"

" _Promise me_."

I slogged through the mud in my brain. "Remove it now. If—" no amount of mud could spare me from _that_ — "if I can't handle it, I shouldn't be—"

Shisui frowned, but his hands found my shoulders and my head erupted in pain. "I—" I struggled to keep both of his faces in sight. "Okay," I said after a few minutes. "I'm good. It's still activated."

He couldn't hide the relief (if Itachi didn't see Shisui die, the Mangekyō might never activate). "I'll see you, friends," Shisui whispered. "I leave the rest . . . to you."

I watched him fall, and I watched him stab himself. I would never forget it. Any of it. Not now, not forever. I would forever remember the sound of my own eye being ripped out, and I would remember the desperation and devotion and regret.

But . . . I had the ability to hide the Sharingan for the rest of my life. I could hide it to whatever extent I wished.

 _I couldn't hide it from Itachi._

 _I couldn't. Itachi._

A million sparkling diamonds shattered on the face of the water below, and every single one of them would never touch the light of the sun.

* * *

 _~The end._

 _Oh, yes, I went there. Now please, please give me your thoughts. Right now. Reread anything that stood out to you and type your thoughts into that review box before they disappear!_

 _This was toward the dark end, but I think Kana is a naturally anti-dark narrator. But boy, think of the eye exchange bit and what damage that would do to someone with enhanced hearing that's so much a part of them. I was even going to describe it . . . but google searching what that sounds like brought me to an absolutely nightmare fuel news article and I couldn't force my fingers to write it. Side note, that same(ish) dialogue happens with Shisui and Itachi, and you should go watch it. YouTube's title is "Shisui's speech to Itachi - Naruto Shippuden." Google searching will bring it up first._

 _Thoughts gone now_ _? Good. Guess what my favorite typo was in this one? "My duty is to more than a clam." *snickers* *snickers at your pain* As a less painful reflection, I didn't noticed that I'd used "sparkling" in that last sentence until just now. Oh, the feels._

 _Review reply for the anonymous: Guest (I aim to please!) _

_So, so many reasons this plot could have conceivably happened. I talked a friend's ear off with a whole walkthrough of them the other day. But._

 _This one was fated to never happen . . . because no, I am not giving Kana a Sharingan. Hello, over-powered! Not in this fic, thank you. Now, if you're really upset, you are free to write a continuation yourself. Go for it. No takers? *snickers* Hehe, takers. Takers of the Shar . . . enough talking from me. Time for me to be Sharingan!_

 _(Don't blame me. You read that bad pun with your own eyes. Eyes. . . .)_


	6. Teacher trepidation

_~Hey, guys! I realize I've been gone for a while again, so let me share this old bonus thingummy with you. People who reviewed chapter 18 of the main story have already read it._

 _This was inspired by an old poll I ran on genin teams and leaders._

* * *

 _ **Time: Hypothetical**_

* * *

 _ **Ninja Academy, Konoha. Day of Kana's graduation**_

* * *

". . . and Hatake Wakana. Uchiha Itachi."

I hate my life. "Kato," I hissed.

"Yes?"

"Look, I'll trick Itachi and you take him out with a lightning jutsu, got it? I can impersonate him until—" I frowned, turning to the random kid on my left. "What?" I said. "You'll probably collapse during an E-rank, anyway. Weren't you supposed to be finding Tsunade-san to fix that?"

The kid frowned right back. "What are you talking about? Do all teammates start out accusing like this?"

"Nice try," I hissed. "But I know your heartbeat."

"Sensei! Can I please be placed on a different team?"

* * *

". . . and Hatake Wakana. Uchiha Shisui."

I really hate my life.

"Let's go, small minions! Who wants to play tag?" The rest of the classroom stared in disbelief as my new team was swept out of the room by the one Uchiha that defied the clan's stereotype. Haha, no. Not happening.

"Teamwork!" the Uchiha tutted seconds later, snatching me out of a confused jumble of playing children. "It's okay to want to be alone, but you need to get to know your team first."

Was it wrong to wish the massacre had ended up happening?

* * *

". . . and Hatake Wakana. Nara Shikaku." Well, hey, that's not so . . . wait. This is a trap.

Shika glanced at me. "I'm sorry," he said.

"No, you're not. You encourage him to play me at shōgi, you traitor."

And sure enough, that was what happened. Three-on-one shōgi? Teammates that had no concept of the concept of strategy?

. . . And as it happened, Shadow Possession that wouldn't let me leave?

* * *

". . . and Hatake Wakana. Yamato."

(I love you. You're normal.)

"Okay, now for the first test I'm going to leave you in the Forest of Death tonight. Then, tomorrow—yes, Kana?"

I smiled. "Nothing." Eh, he would probably camp out overhead, anyway.

Still, it didn't sound that bad.

* * *

". . . and Hatake Wakana. Morino Ibiki."

Mission one: get into T&I. Fail and get left there.

* * *

". . . and Hatake Wakana. Shiranui Genma."

Must. Poison. Toothpick.

* * *

 _~Anonymous replies: SKYSPRITE (Yep! And that's part of why it's not happening), Guest (Aw, glad to hear it!)_

 _Thanks for sticking around, all of you. I'm pretty overwhelmed right now. Give it a month and my schedule might allow more time to write. For right now, I have obligations and this thing called a professional future going on. Kinda need to focus on those things. At least until I get past some deadlines and so ons._


	7. Love letters (Ch1)

_~For a while now, reviewers to the main story have received some "bonus content" as thanks for reviewing. Since I can't PM anonymous readers, I decided that I'd post all bonus content exactly a year after the corresponding chapter was posted. This short was the bonus for Chapter 19. Now, on that note:_

 _SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS if you haven't finished Chapter 19!_

* * *

 **Time: Prologue**

* * *

 **Kakashi's apartment, Konoha. Two years after Kyūbi.**

* * *

 ** _Warning! If you don't know who their mother is, DO NOT READ this yet._**

* * *

Kakashi—

Believe me, I didn't want to send this letter. We might have been on opposite sides of that marriage assassination mission, but, well, we carried through and consequences happen. You're a hard man to pin down, Kakashi.

In case you didn't realize who I was when I dropped my henge, I'm Terumī Mei, a jōnin from Kirigakure. We've met before, but not on good terms. Quite frankly, I hated you. I might still hate you. I had goals and dreams, and you were content to just be a weapon. You ruined my life.

I thought I'd get past it, you know? I'd steel myself. People have done worse things, and death is hardly something to get worked up over in our lives. But when I learned there were two, I knew I couldn't do it.

My village is corrupt. Our Academy students are told to butcher each other, and even our civilians vote for the slaughter of our remaining bloodline limits. My dream was to change that. Perhaps I could work my way into a position of power and fix the unacceptable brutality of my village. But that dream has changed.

I _will_ take control of my village through any means necessary. Kiri will become a village where children can be raised without fear or prejudice. But that isn't possible for my children.

Please beg the Hokage for sanctuary for your children, and I promise that my village will never ask for their loyalty. I will renounce all contact with them. I can't promise anything yet, but if my goal is fulfilled, Konoha will never have difficulties from Kiri again. Any fool can see that a Kiri with new administration will seek allies, and you are no fool, Kakashi. These children are precious resources. The Sandaime is hard, but I have never seen him to be cruel. I beg you, Kakashi. We were young and reckless, but these are _unborn children_. _Your_ children.

It shouldn't escape your notice that you have until late February or early March. I have requested a long-term mission, and I will send the appropriate location to you when that time draws near. Whatever method I use to get this to you will be reversible.

I will keep my pregnancy a secret. If you try to get out of this, I will _make sure_ you care for these babies. Maybe that doesn't scare you, but believe me when I say I will do _anything_ to keep these children safe. If I have this shred of humanity left, then so do you. Please, just give them a chance.

* * *

 _~I think we can safely assume that this letter was nearly the cause of a heart attack. Beyond that, though, I think it explains a lot. (And by the way, it's no mistake that Kakashi lives in an apartment here. Little details are so much fun!)_

 _Reply to Guest: Ack, just don't ask me to update KK. That's actually hard and requires effort._

 _On the off-chance you didn't know, there's a Q &A going for the main story. Really, I'd love to hear your questions and completely avoid answering them. Ask me or the characters anything you like and I'll answer one way or another. You can ask from right here. And you don't have to, but it could be lots of fun to read!_

 _Not that I'm super thrilled to get certain clamshell characters to answer personal questions . . . well. Enough confession time. Happy self-insert!_

 _:D_


	8. Seal or so (Ch20)

Another chapter's bonus content has timed out, so here's the product line that Isami was selling in Kiri back during chapter 20.

Too bad these don't exist in real life, huh?

* * *

 **Gag tags**! Completely harmless, imaginary fun for CHILDREN!

Gag tags bring the illusionary genjutsu art to children of every background. Each tag (recognizable by its creamy paper and the orange spiral of Akatsuki Weapons' logo) is designed to give your child a completely safe, exciting experience. Each seal creates a different illusion that will disappear cleanly and completely in a specified range of minutes. NO chakra needed to activate! NO mess!

-rubber ducks, glitter bomb, soap bubbles, wildflowers, fairies, rain, kittens, puppies, goldfish

* * *

Introducing the never-before-seen **BODY TAG**! These tags bring disguises to life in unprecedented ways. From mustaches to wings, you can feed your imagination without having to use chakra!

*body tags have a harmless, nontoxic adhesive and must be applied directly to skin. Please see vendor for any concerns

*for safety reasons, body tags are not designed to be lifelike

-hat, mustache, assorted wings, peg leg, boots, assorted horns, cape, and many more!

* * *

 **Battle-Ready Gag Tags**

Limited only by your creativity, these tags are disguised as common explosive tags. Each tag will release a different illusion when activated - hardly the explosion your opponent will suspect! All seals have been tested and approved for battle.


	9. First expressions (Ch1)

_~This short was the bonus content for Chapter 21. It's from Kakashi's point of view, and it fills in some of the dialogue from the first chapter. Just watch this guy's opinion shiiiift._

 _Side note - there's a new poll in my profile. Would anyone here like to see a giant (as I see it) celebration of SI OC fics? I was thinking maybe we could do some voting for most popular/sad/etc, best portrayals of certain characters, innovative plots, and if you have ideas feel free to let me know in a review or PM. A big list of fics, a stats comparison of SIs, maybe some fun flowcharts of plots or something . . . but my favorite idea is getting authors in on this to write crossover scenes between the characters - fights, dialogue, bragging battles - and boy, if we could get some short scenes illustrated, well, that sounds pretty awesome. You guys are on board, right?_

* * *

 **Time: Chapter 1**

* * *

 **Hospital, somewhere. Two years after Kyūbi.**

* * *

His first thought of her was that surely she wasn't his. It wasn't that he found her impossibly adorable or perfect. No, she looked just as wrinkled and hideous as the rest of her kind. That was, assuming this nurse's baby was even one of his much-regretted twins.

The nurse beamed at him, attention cheerfully shifting away from her burden. "Good afternoon! You're Kana-chan's father?" She grinned happily, probably overjoyed to rid herself of one of the hospital's squalling newborns.

But this ugly baby was Wakana, his . . . daughter. She . . . she—

He steeled himself. "Yes." How could something so . . . pure, innocent, spotless—come from him? He had killed children. She shouldn't be able to fix wide, blue eyes on his with such fascination (Indeed, she shouldn't, a contentious part of his brain reminded him. The blue color would fade soon, but young babies' eyes took weeks to fully develop for all but a few clans and chakra types. It was simply an illusion. Nature's gift to infants).

Right. Best to smile and show her that he wasn't affected. He had read books about children. He was prepared. He faced the unexpectedly innocent eyes. "Good morning, Wakana-chan."

She burped and wiggled. Fortunately, a scowling newborn with a wad of drool was not attractive in the slightest.

"Sorry, Kana-chan," the nurse apologized—to a baby! "Here, sweet, don't you want your bottle?"

When the tiny girl began to scream, Kakashi finally saw a fragment of what he'd overlooked.

This child was not Kakashi. Because so far, she didn't have to be.

He didn't know what he wanted her to be at all. But something. Eventually. He'd decide later.

(For now, he'd settle with her being quiet.)

* * *

 _~And then, Kakashi carried two newborns back to Konoha. Lucky him._


	10. Overload (Ch22)

_~Another one of the chapter-specific shorts today._

 _So the background for this short is that chūnin exam that happened in Kiri. Chūnin exams are obviously a great time to sell things, and when you're building relations between villages, it pays to send nice products to help with those relations. In other words, gag tags. Which means someone gets to sell them. Insert short._

* * *

 **Time: Chapter 22**

* * *

 **Main stadium, Kiri. Eight years after Kyūbi.**

* * *

 **(Isami's point of view)**

* * *

It was by sheer luck that Isami caught Hatake Kakashi's eye before he walked into the tournament stadium. "Help!" she mouthed.

The ninja in question considered her, glancing at her stand's advertisements. His eye flickered to the stadium's wide doors. _Oh_ , Isami remembered. His idyllic family must be inside. She deflated. He had no reason to help her. He might not even remember that she'd come to Kiri with him.

"Yo," he said from beside her. She squeaked. "Ah, sorry. What's the problem? Do you need help packing?"

Isami had forgotten how terrifying he could be, and it took her a minute to recover her senses. "No," she said. "Not, um. I mean."

Hatake-san gave her a little practiced smile and looked around the stand again. "You don't seem to have any tags left in stock."

"Ah, yes."

He rubbed his neck. "Aren't you supposed to set up inside the tower once the tournament starts?"

Judging from the roars coming from said building, said event was already well on its way. "For intermission," she agreed. "But I've been stuck out here taking orders from people who aren't attending the exam."

"Mah," the ninja said, "We should have put you there the whole time." He paused. "So did you need help?"

Well. . . . "The Hokage said I'd receive shipments from my seal maker at home, but I haven't gotten any and now I'm hundreds of seals behind and I'm worried because she might be dead, but I can't reach her, and I have to take more orders for intermission and after the tournament, and. . . !"

Hatake-san looked like he'd seen a ghost. He swallowed. He coughed awkwardly. "I think your packages were sent to me by mistake," he said. "Let me go get them." He disappeared.

". . . Oh," Isami finished. "I'll just, ah, pack up my stand."

She hoped Suzume had had time to write a lot of seals.

* * *

 _~When you have an outside perspective on what sells well, why not make some products and sell them? Oh, yeah, because demand can be greater than supply._ _But hey, I don't write fics to teach economics - if I did, that would keep me pretty busy._

 _Anyway, yeah, Kakashi messed up a bit. Delivery was his job._

 _Whoa, I didn't realize it's been over a month since I updated KK. I've been working on it pretty constantly. So stay tuned for an update at some point, and keep an eye out for a new chapter here, too._


	11. Letter go

_~Okay, these are kind of random things (bonus content) from old chapters (23 and 24, specifically). I thought I'd merge them together since they're so short. Plus, they're all set at about the same time._

* * *

 _ **Time: Chapter 18**_

* * *

 _ **Hatake residence, Konoha. Eight years after Kyūbi. Before trip to Kiri.**_

* * *

"Dear Kakashi-san," the letter read,

"I love you. I love you more than the stars or the cold embrace of the moon. I love you the way the sun caresses each tiny, delicate seedling—"

"It'll never fool him," Shika interrupted.

"Oh, really? I practically quoted yesterday's mail verbatim."

My friend rolled his eyes. "And did you happen to write any of yesterday's mail?"

"Shut up," I muttered. "Maybe next time your parents are gone, I'll see if I can find any old letters, and then you'll get blamed for snooping."

"My mom wouldn't write letters," Shika said, but the tiny edge of uncertainty was enough to convince me otherwise. Besides, while I couldn't complain about wrinkles yet, I was still closer to his mother's age than his own. I wasn't exactly blind.

* * *

.

* * *

 _~How sweet! It's like valentines._ _Anyway, on to the old concepts. These ones obviously didn't end up happening. Which means they're effectively the opposite of spoilers, but just in case:_

 _Warning: basically spoilers for the Uchiha Massacre. Don't let yourself miss out! Please read about that in the main story first._

 _I'm glad I didn't end up using these concepts. I like how the story ended up. But hey, I'm glad I wrote these out a bit! If I hadn't, I might not have been able to improve on them. At least, I'm pretty sure I improved on them with the decisions I made for the plot._

* * *

 _ **Time: Hypothetical (the night of the Massacre)**_

* * *

 **Uchiha compound, Konoha. Eight years after Kyūbi.**

* * *

 _Had Kana been at a sleepover with her friend Uchiha Kiyomi during the night of the massacre:_

"Kiyomi."

"Yes, Kana-chan?"

I slapped myself mentally. "Let's henge into each other!"

She frowned. "Why?"

"If we can fool your relatives, we're pretty good, ne?"

* * *

 _ **Time: Hypothetical (the night of the Massacre)  
**_

* * *

 _ **Hatake residence, Konoha. Eight years after Kyūbi.**_

* * *

 _Had the Hatake family been in the village during the massacre and Kakashi been retired from ANBU for a while. Assuming that, had Kana heard what had happened and met Kakashi in their house:_

"Daddy?" The ANBU in the living room glanced at me. "You're back in active service?" I asked softly.

"You're really too smart," he pondered, thoughts clearly on a different matter. "We're going to have to have a talk when I get back."

"When will that be?"

He gave me a hug, tousling my hair. "Take care of your otōto."

"Daddy."

He sighed. "I know he was your friend, but people change."

I stared at the whirl of departed leaves, deciding not to follow. "Circumstances change. People don't."

* * *

 _~A moment of silence for that idealism. But anyway. The first of the concepts had some merit. It might have ended up with Kiyomi's survival. Or with Kana dead. Henging would have been better than just waiting to die, and if they'd started early enough, maybe they could have found refuge somewhere. Probably not._

 _The second concept is the non-plot-twist massacre that us pessimists were expecting. I'll probably sneak that last quotation somewhere into the main story at some point. Maybe even the reinstatement into service. We shall see! Keep an eye out. :)_

 _(And yes, the title was definitely intended. I always worry I won't be able to think of a good title, and without fail, when I'm submitting the new chapter, inspiration strikes. Just maybe not always good inspiration.)_


	12. Conceptemplation

_Hi, all! This was the bonus content for chapter 25, as some of you will recall._

 _When I add a new character to my stories, I often write out a sample future scene to get a feel for how to write the character. There's too much "glowing praise" in this scene for it to be real, so it was an old attempt to figure out how Itachi and Kana work together. (I'll also point out that Kana wasn't as "advanced" as I expected by this point in the story. Ha!) And that's behind-the-scenes in my writing brain for you._

* * *

 ** _Time: Hypothetical_**

* * *

 ** _Somewhere in Konoha, would be about eight years after Kyūbi._**

* * *

"You're staring at me," I informed him. "It's not an uncharacteristic habit for you, but you don't even have the Sharingan activated."

"You just turned six."

I met his dark eyes boldly, not bothering to stir up a dose of panic. "And you're thirteen. So?"

"You entered the Academy last year."

"Freeing Daddy for open missions, yes."

Itachi frowned. "According to my calculations, you should graduate next year."

"Oh, really."

He glared at me—his nonabrasive, intense, hush-up expression. "You are mature enough to be a genin. Your skill at genjutsu is more than mine was as an Academy student."

I raised my eyebrows. "Isn't that embarrassing."

"Your henges are better than most chūnin's. You are intelligent. With more physical training, you could pass the exam. However, you refuse."

Deep, piercing eyes stared into mine. I shrugged. "What if I don't want to be a ninja? What if I don't want to be my father? What if I don't want to be you? What if I'm still a child?"

"A genin is legally an adult." Well, I'd lived _that_ lie before. It didn't change my life.

"Well, what's wrong with staying a child?"

He looked away, and I knew what he was thinking. In this world, remaining a child was pure selfishness. Those of us who knew this . . . it was our duty to protect the future.

* * *

 _~So I've been working on a different project during this month. Don't worry, I'm not giving up on KK. I should start working on KK again in a few days. I just had to devote a bunch of time to something else for a while. Sorry for the wait! Thanks for still reading, guys. The longer I write, the more I appreciate you readers._


	13. Mutual mistake (Ch26)

_~First, we have the bonus content for chapter 26, which was posted a year ago. After that, there's a SHORT! Set during chapter 26._

 _Warning: original content! Sasuke! Fighting! Stay tuned to find out more._

 _So first, here's Kana's nightmares about the future teams:_

* * *

"Team One," Iruka announced, "is Uchiha Sasuke, Haruno Sakura, and Hatake Wakana."

"No," I pleaded. "Don't make me the go-between. He doesn't even like me."

"Nonsense," Iruka said, frowning.

Sasuke scooted a hair closer to Sakura. "Redhead," he muttered. "Phobia."

I'll show you phobia.

* * *

Team Two," Iruka continued, "is Shikamaru, Wakana, and Kakashi."

"Wait," I objected, turning to look at the strangely young, silver-headed, grouchy boy seated at a far corner of the room. "I like Shikamaru. But I can't be on a team with my own father. He's a jōnin. He's an adult!"

The child-sized version of Kakashi morphed into my parent's familiar adult form. "I knew it," he hissed. "You LIKE someone."

Shikamaru paled and ripped off his hitai-ate.

Things went downhill after that.

* * *

"The next team is Naruto, Kiba, and Kana. Quiet down, you two. Quiet. Quiet! Kana, get back in that window or so help me—"

* * *

"Naruto, Kana, and Sasuke."

Was my dream even trying anymore?

* * *

"Pakkun, Kana, and—"

And this is the point where overthinking becomes unhealthy.

* * *

 _~Hee hee! And now, the serious short. I've mentioned the Academy tournament a few times in recent chapters, and I'm finally ready to share what happened with you guys. Enjoy!_

* * *

 _._

* * *

 **Time: Chapter 26**

* * *

 **Ninja Academy, Konoha. Twelve years after Kyūbi.**

* * *

The first annual academy tournament was somewhat blatantly designed to build teamwork and competition, and it managed both quite well. After all, there's no friend like your rival. (Hm, I should make a saying about that. We already have "the severed hand reaches best." Ninja puns stink.)

The tournament involved two parts. The first was a straightforward hand-to-hand tournament . . . how shocking. Everyone in the top four tracks of the Academy, which was the uppermost two years of students, participated. Kato and I were both in different tracks, but we were involved. In fact, since the tournament was a month before the next graduation exam, the Rookie Nine were in the highest track.

No one knew what the second part of the tournament would include, but we knew what the first part entailed, and we'd all been sparring regularly for a few years. We put our fighting faces on and guessed who would last the longest. It was a shame Hyūga Neji had graduated last year. If he'd still been around, there wouldn't have been anything to guess about.

Anyway, the day of the tournament came and we all buckled down accordingly. We fought the students in our own tracks first. This was pretty fair. While the older tracks had less students and therefore less fights, the older students were also relatively familiar with their opponents. The younger tracks had too many students for everyone to remember each other. But then, of course, there was me.

When you have ridiculously good hearing, there's always going to be something pressing at the back of your mind. When you're taking a test, it's other students muttering wrong answers. When you're listening to a lecture, there's always a fun technique or joke being discussed in the next room. And when you're bored out of your mind, there's always a class using the training field for combat training. So while I didn't know many of my peers by name, I knew how a lot of fights had gone. And let's just say that in the days before the tournament, I'd brushed up on things.

Some kids won, more lost. By afternoon, there were only a few kids left in each track. I was one of them—I was _not_ going home to tell Daddy that his fastidiously-trained little girl couldn't handle some mere children (he'd worry even more about my vulnerability). On the other hand, this wasn't exactly some great glory. A chūnin exam involved other countries. Today was essentially just sparring with a larger class. Only a few people would even do that much.

Our teachers decided we'd weeded out enough kids and began herding us into the most spacious training field at the academy. It wasn't the usual sparring area, but there was a scuffed chalk circle drawn in the dirt in the center. I rolled my eyes. Why did every event with children always seem thrown together at the last minute?

The crowd of milling students was so thick that I didn't even realize there was another spar going on. By the time I'd fought my way to the front of the crowd, two more had gone by. I suppose I was pretty annoyed. I'm not a fan of crowds.

Kato elbowed his way over to me and filled me in. As I'd suspected, he'd been in one of the recent fights. He'd won the first spar, and his opponent had been one of my own classmates.

"I'm going to smash my head against something," I told him. "Did you notice that the younger years are watching out of their windows?"

He hadn't. He'd been too busy fighting.

"It's _so loud_ ," I complained. "All of this hype is stupid, and—" A teacher grabbed me by an arm and pulled me into the ring.

"Make the seal of confrontation," she ordered before letting go and backing away.

I made the seal and for the thousandth time today bit down on the urge to claw at my ears. Which was why when I looked up to see Uchiha Sasuke forming the other half of the seal, I felt an urge to punch something.

A whole _morning_ of constant spars and chattering voices, and I didn't even hear this coming? I was so going to punch something.

As Sasuke came at me, it occurred to me that here was something to punch. And, ah, well.

* * *

Sasuke was not thrilled with his day so far.

For starters, he'd woken up _sinking_. In a _pond_.

Shisui's annoying habit of body flickering meant that the man went too far in more ways than one.

No, wait. There was no room for humor right now. Because he was busy reminding himself of his many reasons to be disgruntled.

Besides _the reason_ (which occupied every moment Shisui wasn't in), there were a few highlights. Once he'd swum out of the pond, Shisui had refused to train with him. Annoying man. This was the day of the academy-wide sparring tournament—he couldn't let the clan's name be dragged through the mud. Shisui had no problem training him in the clan style most of the _other_ days he was home.

He'd beaten his opponents with exactly the usual amount of effort. Couldn't they _try_ to improve? Even the class idiot, Naruto . . . or something, had started using different angles. But no, Naruto had been eliminated early on. _Idiot_. . . .

The only _interesting_ fight he'd had had been with Ino, who'd stopped that horrible strategy of blinking her eyes long enough to actually sneak under his guard. But that had been an hour ago, and now the teachers were refusing to let him leave to train. This gave every female in his year plenty of time to gather into their usual groups and giggle about him.

By the time the teachers began rounding everyone up for the last few spars, he'd begun to brood on _the reason_ again. There wasn't much to take his mind off of it. Well, admittedly the Hatake boy darted his way through a very neat spar. Maybe it was time to train even harder again, if a boy two years his junior was that—

"You're up," one of the teachers told Sasuke, standing in front of him and meeting his eyes coolly.

 _Finally, something to do_. He made the seal of confrontation and sized up his new opponent—it was _her_.

Uchiha Sasuke had never been one to care about girls. Sure, he'd loved his mother, and he'd recognized that one day, he would probably have a wife. In the meantime, girls were simply classmates with slightly higher pitched voices.

Or so he had assumed, until one day _that person_ had begun teasing him. _That person_ ( _His name is Itachi_ , Shisui's voice butted in) had found a girl Sasuke had only seen once before in his life and teased Sasuke. Sasuke had consoled himself that he would never see the girl again.

Not so.

The orange-haired girl was suddenly everywhere. Friends in the Uchiha clan, staying at the Academy to practice, talking to his classmates, hiding in the bushes during her lunch hour. She never said more than the occasional hello to Sasuke. She barely noticed him.

He never talked to her, either, but it was hard to ignore stories of the Copy Ninja's twins. Wakana stood out for more reasons than just her flashy hair. She was loved and hated by many in the school. Her only real flaw was the nonexistent skill she showed with projectile weapons, but Sasuke was willing to bet that that was a front. He'd seen the glint in her eye. He knew someone who trained that hard couldn't be a failure.

The shock of seeing _her_ wore off and he lashed out. Or, attacked. The exact word didn't concern him.

He threw himself into the Uchiha style that Shisui had finally taught him and ducked low, aiming at her knees. She jumped the swipe and matched his follow-up punch easily. She mirrored it, in fact, catching his fist as she swung one of her own legs in a low swipe.

 _Funny_ , he hadn't thought she'd just copy his moves thoughtlessly, but he could use that to his advan— The leg swipe had mirrored his so closely that he'd instinctively reached out to block a punch that never came. Instead, her other leg moved in a blur and struck at his neck.

Sasuke threw himself to the side, all too aware that she'd landed a solid hit. He rolled upright, but she tackled him.

It was a short and brutal fight. Sasuke had never encountered an opponent so willing to . . . well, fight. Most of his classmates either spent too much time thinking or too little. Wakana was in the fight to win.

They grappled until Sasuke found a foothold and knocked her away. This time he pulled out a kunai. She matched the move. She went on the offensive now, hitting him with strikes that he had no choice but to dodge. He was losing. Something about her style of fighting (or rather her, when fighting) was disconcerting.

Normal fights were one person against another. Two styles clashing, two personalities breaking against each other until one prevailed. It was a struggle and a thrill. This, however, felt like Sasuke was fighting a version of himself that he couldn't trust.

It was almost like the Sharingan. Somehow, Wakana slipped past his guard again and again because she took on his mannerisms and twisted them. It was _strange_. It was different. It wasn't perfect, because several of his hits knocked her back and she'd developed a black eye by the end of the spar. Sasuke ignored his own body's pain.

Several minutes into the fight, he jumped back to avoid one of her kicks and tripped over a mound of dirt. He opened his eyes to see her forming the seal of reconciliation. The crowd of students was cheering her on.

"You blacked out," she offered, smiling crookedly. "Only for a second, but the teachers said I won. Sorry."

Sasuke didn't reply, but he did form the seal.

He didn't leave the crowd after their spar. Shisui always knew the latest village gossip, and since Sasuke could no longer win, he would need some way to stave off Shisui's incessant questions.

Wakana was slower than Sasuke. She appeared to have less stamina—she wasn't one for drawn-out fights. By rights, he should have won their spar.

As he watched the deceptively fluid style, he found himself oddly doubtful. It was _subtle._ Facial expressions, shifted posture. Whatever she was doing was almost impossible for him to observe. It seemed pointless, even. Why mimic someone else when you could just fight them on your own terms?

Her opinion worked here, where her opponents were at roughly the same skill level. On a battlefield, Sasuke didn't doubt be dead.

* * *

Okay, so I went overboard sparring with Sasuke. I realized that partway through, when it struck me that if he hadn't been good at blocking, he would have ended up missing something important, like most of the blood in his body. The thing was, once I noticed, I wasn't exactly disposed to toning things down, which would have meant losing. This was probably my only chance to beat an Uchiha in a fight—ever.

Not to mention that this was the only Uchiha I'd ever have a chance at beating.

Having "sparred" with both Itachi and Shisui over the years, I can safely say that the only way someone like me could beat one of them would be in a dream. Sasuke was only a few months ahead of me in the Academy and the odds there were astronomically lower.

All the same.

For whatever reason, I knew how Sasuke fought. Some part of it was engrained in me. Perhaps I had a dim recollection of the old anime. Perhaps I'd predicted the way he'd use the Uchiha style. Or maybe.

Sasuke tripped over a rough patch on the ground and slammed his head. _Oops. Ack, did I accidentally cheat with a genjutsu?!_ The answer to that, fortunately, was no. Today's genjutsu was a butterfly (which was leading two Aburame insects on a merry chase, it seemed).

I'd beaten Sasuke through his own misstep.

Somewhat annoying. I'd fought and concentrated and even synchronized with him to an extent—why couldn't I have won through my own efforts?

 _You wouldn't have won_ , a thought whispered as I watched Sasuke's eyelids flutter. _You can't mimic forever_.

Right, then. Fine. I'd win.

But . . . was my feeling right? Did my hearing really read the essence of my opponent and let me become it?

Best to forget about it for now.

* * *

One week following the tournament was the day we all expected the second part of it to land on. It was a logical choice. Our schedules allowed for it, the weather was expected to be fair by then, and I privately thought that a week would be important to mend any hurt feelings among the many bitter students.

Not so. The day after the tournament, the entire top two years of students were marched outside, split into eight groups, and sent to eight different sections of Konoha's woods. Naruto and Sasuke were in my group, but then so were plenty of other students. Kato's group had Shikamaru and I watched them leave with jealousy.

The best part of today was that what had started out as a morning drizzle turned into decent rain by noon. Whatever. At least we'd gotten to eat lunch before our teachers had handed us off.

When my group arrived at a suitably wet clearing in the middle of an even wetter section of trees, I was starting to feel a bit testy. The horde wasn't precisely quiet. And while I hadn't brought a raincoat today, Naruto had, and he wouldn't stop offering it to me. It was January. It was cold outside. I was wearing my own coat, thanks. Stop offering, Naruto!

The poor soul that was in charge of herding us students opened a storage scroll and told us to gather around. It was time for survival training.

"Hey," Naruto whispered (a feat in itself), "there's more of us than packs. Wanna team up?"

"Sure," I replied. "If we get to pick."

No, we did not get to choose our teammates. If we had, you'd better believe I would have joined one of the three-man teams. But anyway. As names were called, the group's grumbling increased. Pretty much every team had two people who as of yesterday held a grudge against each other. Or probably only the loser of each specific fight held the grudge, I suppose. So I wasn't surprised when I was paired up with Sasuke. He wasn't, either.

I grabbed one of the packs and followed him into the woods after all of the directions had been given. Make a shelter, look out for flash flooding, find food, don't kill each other. The objective was to be sane and healthy when morning came. From the sound of things, most of the teams weren't going to last that long.

After all, sunset was coming and the rain was picking up even more.

Like all unprecedented, somewhat tiring, crazy difficult, two-day Academy events, this one had been designed by a sadist. And why can I say that? Well.

"Sasuke-san, wait a minute." He didn't pause. I allowed myself a sigh before I darted up to his side. "I'm serious. Can you stop walking?"

He of the messy black hair aimed an unamused, dark-eyed glance at me and stopped. "The sooner we make our camp, the sooner we get out of the rain," he said.

 _Yeah, buddy, ain't no one getting out of this rain tonight_ , my thoughts complained, but I pushed them aside. "We need to see what's in the pack," I told him, and I reached for the buckle. I had a horrible feeling of what was inside the pack.

There was a poof as a seal released. And then nothing.

Sasuke snatched the pack out of my hands. "Are you serious? You took an empty pack?"

"I didn't see you picking one," I retorted quickly.

"Because any _idiot_ can choose a full pack."

Wow, two minutes in and our friendship had grown this much. I glanced up at the rain—good thing I found the sound relaxing instead of headache worthy—and pulled forth a scrap of patience. Then I met his glower with my own dark-eyed gaze (thanks to the black eye he'd given me yesterday). "The packs looked exactly alike, and it weighed the right amount, too. Opening it broke a seal. I bet you that every single pack was the exact same way." Four packs and counting, to be precise. I'm surprised he didn't hear the yelling.

"You shouldn't have opened it until we found our campsite," he argued, unwilling to be pacified.

Maybe, maybe not. I'd find out. Regardless, "Well, I did. So now that we know what we're missing, we can start filling the pack."

There were flags in our part of the woods. Each team had been assigned to one, and we were responsible to find it. So this was the first order of business. Plus collecting firewood along the way, locating a rabbit for Sasuke to kill (finally, a time I didn't mind having bad aim), collecting a few of the herbs we'd been assigned, and wondering if our clothes would ever be dry again. Why had he worn that open-necked shirt on a rainy winter day?!

By the time we found our flag, it was almost dark and we were both quite frustrated. We'd passed the stupid thing by at least once. So after the obligatory blaming game, he put the rabbit down, I put the pack down, and we raced the sun (what sun? It was pouring) to get a shelter up. Fortunately, there was room for a fire inside (if you wanted burned toes) and our collected firewood could be dried with a jutsu.

I stepped outside to skin the rabbit and handed it inside to Sasuke. I didn't really want to fight him, a rabbit, and a fire for space. It was safer outside. I could listen to the peaceful night sounds of a deluge and of grumpy chūnin jumping through the trees to check on us.

All things considered, I think Sasuke and I were getting along pretty well.

* * *

Sasuke. Wanted. To. Punch. Her.

She was outside for now, one of her few wise moves of the day.

An empty pack! How had she taken an empty pack? She hadn't even seemed sorry.

He'd lost to her in the tournament, and now he was going to lose points here, too. This was unacceptable.

Sasuke knew that Wakana probably worked almost as hard as he did (living up to the Hatake name wasn't as illustrious as his own clan's was, but Hatake Kakashi was probably just as unattainable a standard as Shisui). Sasuke was willing to accept the results of the spar. He was _not_ going to forgive her laissez-faire attitude.

So when he'd finished roasting the rabbit over their makeshift spit, he cut off a piece and began eating. She was outside in the rain and probably hungry. He didn't care.

Wakana, however, cared quite a bit when she edged her way back into the sparse space of their shelter. "You burned it," she said crossly.

Sasuke nobly chose not to point out that she hadn't volunteered to cook.

"I skinned it for you and made sure the firewood wouldn't burn too hot," she stated dangerously. "How did you mess that up?"

He refused to admit that he'd used a fireball jutsu to help the meal along.

"Don't mind me," the glowering girl continued, "I've only been in the rain finding more of the plants _you_ couldn't be bothered to look for. You couldn't even take down the spit?"

"The plants will be there in the morning," Sasuke snapped back. " _You_ weren't here to take your share of the rabbit."

"Of course not—it wasn't supposed to be ready yet!"

"Then you should have cooked it yourself."

"I was—"

But Sasuke wasn't finished. "You couldn't even kill it," he said antagonistically.

Oops. Famous last words.

Wakana took the taunt for what it was and expressed her opinion very definitively.

* * *

I'll hand it to Sasuke, he gave as good as he got. Even though I was a girl, he muscled past his chauvinistic urges to return some of the "favors" I gifted him with.

I like to think that the black eye I gave him was very tasteful (after all, he'd given me one yesterday).

As we scuffled in the tiny shelter right next to a healthy fire, we quickly realized that fighting in such a small space was a terrible idea. A _terrible_ idea. Ah, heh. Awkward trumps anger, as it happens.

Ahem.

We both backed out of the awkwardness with an almost single-minded agreement to never speak of this again.

And to my knowledge, that is exactly what happened.

This seems like a suspiciously fast conclusion to the tale, right? Surely more than that happened?

Ha, nope!

Sasuke and I handed our pack over in the morning and never even congratulated ourselves on our success.

And that's my story and I'm sticking to it, no matter what Kato says.

He has no proof.

He never will.

* * *

 _~So what do you think (happened)? Thanks for reading, and see you around!_

2.16.18


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